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Ahhhh... a lazy Sunday. It's been an interesting four weeks. I started out the beginning of April ( and actually ended March ) sick as a dog. Haven't been really laid up like that in a long time. Being off work is always nice, but I got practically nothing accomplished during that first week off. Got my spring cleaning done my first REAL week of vacation, and last week was Disneyland. At this moment I should be outside mowing the lawn, but I just can't seem to get there ...

Last night was egg coloring and we had a great time. The kids are getting very creative as they grow into their little artist selves. All the adults had fun too and we wound up with some great eggs ! If someone had told me fifteen years ago that I would be THIS close to my family, I never would have believed it ! I certainly would have laughed if anyone had suggested we would actually vacation together ! Now it's almost a yearly thing. Last year Hawaii ( my folks came too ) and this year Disneyland. Amazing how much fun we can have together.

We're very lucky. I am truly grateful. I look at my life often enough and wonder why I'm not happier. Wonder why I'm not more content. I have it all, really. A wonderful home, good friends, a stable job, and a great family. I'm out of debt, I have a partner who loves honors and supports who I am, and I have some God-given ( ? ) talent that I occasionally get to put to use for my own artistic development. I wonder what it is that leaves me feeling like something is still askew ...

It's a journey for me. Spiritual, emotional ... maybe both. Maybe I'm just having a little trouble hearing the little voice inside that I KNOW is saying " you're enough " .

" Relax "

I wonder if other people feel that way ? Like something is missing. Like something is out there and is constantly poking at my whole notion of contentment. Maybe I'm expecting too much from the world. Or maybe it's something simple, like I need more sleep ;)

As we move through Spring, I think I'll focus on my own contentment. I'll concentrate on setting my own pace. I'll listen for that little voice ... and when I hear it, I'll abide ...